Thursdays with Taryn~ Join me in talking about nothing much... #Life #Time #Determination #Blessings

I honestly don't know what to write about anymore. I used to post blogs almost daily and never failed to ramble on about something. That was also during a time in my life when I was most productive in my novel writing as well. Perhaps I need to do this as an experiment to see just where my thoughts veer off the path today. And maybe I need to do this more often to keep the writerly juices flowing...

We'll see...

I've still been struggling with myself- my journey- as a writer. I finished the edits of Love By Design a while back, but I withdrew into myself and I'll admit, I've been suffering with a bit of self-doubt that I'm just starting to feel lifting its weight off of me.

I've been in avoidance mode, or it feels that way. If I don't think about it, maybe my not-up-to-snuff stories will just vanish. I've let this drag me under the tow for a while now, but I think I'm starting to resurface and I'm catching my breath again. Perhaps I will find my inspiration and desire once more and stop letting the childish part of me wallow in massive heap of self-pity. I have work to do, it's just a matter of slapping myself around some and knocking the good sense back into me.

I know it does me no good to wallow like I have been, but I just feel at a loss, uncertain where I'm heading with my writing and my life, and sometimes I feel like I'm going at this all wrong, or totally alone. A lot of the time, it looks something like this blurry mess below- rolling down a secluded back road, a solitary traveler with a dirty windshield who's moving so swiftly I can't enjoy the scenery or stop to think for a while. Maybe that's just Life whisking by and it's pulling me along with it whether I want to go that fast or not.

It would be great if Life would slow down for us, but it doesn't. If we don't enjoy it, it will get away from us and that goes for all things- whether it's enjoying the flowers blooming in your yard, a quiet sunset, watching your children grow up, celebrating another year of marriage, finishing those novels you set out to write from the heart, cherishing the time with your parents, siblings and extended family and friends.

We need to make the most of all the time we have in this Life~ relish it, enjoy it, revel in it, rather than wallow in the muck and mire, allowing the negative to suck us under and try to drown us.

Take time to breathe today, look around you and count your blessings!

I know I'm going to because I have so many wonderful things to be thankful for.

#MemoryLane Monday- #MyMom #MyCheerleader #Writing #Encouragement

One of my biggest cheerleaders is my mom. When I've felt discouraged or disappointed or lacking, she's my go-to who reminds me I can do anything, be anything, and fusses at me not to give up, especially on my writing.

As a teenager, I lacked a lot of self-confidence. I'd had the problems with school and the tragic loss of my grandfather as well as my weight issues, but after dropping out of school and taking home-school, I also became even more withdrawn and reclusive. I did go a few rounds with typical adolescent depression, probably compounded by the other circumstances in my life, but my mom talked to me—always keeping the lines of communication open—even when I'd rather have shut myself up in my room and pretended I didn't exist. She wouldn't allow me to wallow in self-pity and dislike and she took on the job of being my own personal cheering squad.

When I decided I wanted to be a writer—well, I knew for a long time, but when I told my parents it was something I wanted to pursue seriously, they gave me a Smith Corona word processor/typewriter, a lot of 3 1/2 inch disks and several books marketed to writers and toward the industry (one in particular was The Romance Writers Pink Pages) for Christmas when I was 17.

I dug out the old instructional typewriter book my dad had from his college days and taught myself the basics of typing, while my parents each gave me encouragement in their own ways.

My mom's way? Unadulterated encouragement and praise—

"You can do this."
"You're a born storyteller."
"You've always had a way with words."
"I believe in you."

The best by far was when she told me to hit "send" in my email in February 2011 to submit Castaway Hearts to Turquoise Morning Press- my very first submission. Then she told me she expected me to get published in HER lifetime, because she wants to be able to say "My daughter is a published author."

"I want to see your book and hold it before I'm dead."

I love her to pieces and I'm not sure she'll ever know just how important she is in my life. I tell her, but she brushes it off, never taking me too serious, but maybe one of these days she'll understand what her encouragement means to me. Though I doubt she'll see this blog, I just want to say-

I love you Momma!
Thank you so much for all you've done for me and
every supportive word you've ever given me.

1 Year #Anniversary- #BookContract #writer #TMPress

March 13th, 2011- I didn't know it that day, what was waiting in my email for me, but when I opened that email up, I nearly hyperventilated with excitement when KJ at Turquoise Morning Press offered me a contract for Castaway Hearts.

Now here we are a year later, less than 3 weeks away from the release of my novel and I still get giddy all over again thinking about the day I opened that email. I was about to start painting the living room, hadn't thought much about my email over the weekend and then decided to check it before I got started because I knew painting was going to be an all day job.

A few days later, March 18th, I signed my contract, then the next day I posted And So It Begins...

Gorgeous Novel Cover Helps Ring in 2012!

Happy New Year!

This year started off GREAT, even before it began. Saturday afternoon, New Year's Eve, I finally got around to checking email and there in my inbox was a message I had been eagerly anticipating. My novel cover for Castaway Hearts from my publisher.

Excitement and giggles bubbled to the surface as I opened the email, my husband and daughter eager to see as well. And there it was- BAM!

Beauty in blue that brought tears to my eyes.

My publisher designed the cover and I probably haven't, and can't, possibly express to her just how much I love it and what a wonderful job I think she did on it. Even now, I'm tearing up again- it comes in waves, laughter and tears of joy at just what a beautiful 1st cover I have and how much more REAL this is all getting for me. I dreamed and hoped and imagined this moment for more than 1/2 my life, and to see it and feel it coming to life before my eyes fills me with so many emotions I have a hard time expressing the joy without blathering on and on, gushing over the cover, squeeing with giddiness and tearing up when the dream crashes into reality all over again, the momentum of happiness swelling in my heart until it overflows.

I've been this wishy-washy mess since Saturday, but it's all good. Monday I took the image file to Wal-Mart and printed an 8X10 and bought a pretty frame, so I can have it where I can see it all the time. It's just SO purty!

Now, I have shared the cover on Facebook and Twitter already on Saturday, and it is on my website, along with the book blurb, if you'd like to check it out. I can also proudly say that I have Jimmy Thomas and Teresa Noreen on my cover. Absolutely LOVE it and I'm so proud!

As to this new year- I gave up "resolutions" a long time ago because much as I like to have goals, resolutions feel like goals with little to no wiggle room for Life's ever changing journey and my path might veer off the beaten from time to time and away from the original goal, but I believe that's Life's way anyhow. I do plan to strive toward getting more writing done this year, more editing and hopefully have news on that front more often as Castaway Hearts' release gets closer. I plan to be BLOGGING more, too.

I think one of the reasons I don't blog as much as I used to is because I got it in my head that I can only write about writing on here and I do tend to keep a lot of what's going on in my life more private than I used to, but I think I'm going to change that pattern and try to get back to posting a few times a week. My biggest following and my most active blogging was back when I just wrote to be writing about what was going on in my life, with my writing, and whatever was on my mind.

Being I'm part of the Fiction Witches I will still continue to post my Fun Friday Feature books each week, but I'm hoping to think of other things to write about a few other times a week and I'd be thrilled to have visitors to chat with, etc. It's always wonderful to know I'm talking to real people and not just myself. LOL I also need to figure out how to go about doing blog hops, interviews and guest blogging too, for promo. All in due time.

I do need to find some organization for my writing time versus daily life, as things have been skewed for weeks now since the holidays and I'm eager to find my way back to some sense of normalcy, though I've been doing a lot of thinking about what is "normal" after seeing a fellow author post this little piece of food for thought~

Why do we strive to be normal? Isn't that setting our standards a bit low?

(thank you Shanon Grey)

I think this year, I'm going to strive for EXtra- I'm going to expect excellence from myself. I'm going to make it extraordinary and shoot for being exceptional! In all the things I do, I want to go that extra mile, give that extra push and know I gave it beyond my all.

How can I fail if I expect more from myself?
If I keep a positive attitude and most of all, stop being the roadblock in my own life, what CAN'T I do?