Tuesday, February 9, 2010


It's been a few days since I last posted. I've still had very little to blog about, but I will say my birthday was last Thursday and well, for some, its not a big deal, but for me it was a little bit epic. Probably because it isn't just about the number but the past few years that have seen me going through a lot of emotional and personal changes that I'm still working through it.

I won't go into specifics because, as I said, it's emotional and personal and therefore private, but I will say that I need balance and clarity in my life and that's something I've felt has been lacking.

My birthday was really a normal day, just like any other though I had chosen to go back to bed after everyone was gone to work and school. I hadn't been asleep very long when I awoke because I "felt" something and looked up to see my husband in the doorway of the bedroom. He scared the living daylights out of me because he was supposed to be at work, but he said he took off so that I wouldn't be alone on my birthday. He brought me some pink tulips, a card and a CD of one of my favorite singers- Robin Thicke.
Shortly after hubby came in, I went and got the mail. My grandmother, at my request, had spent some time in the past year working on writing about her life growing up and how she and my grandfather met and got together and things like that. A 33 page, "life story," as she put it, was in a manilla envelope in my mailbox that day. I came in and spent a good portion of the afternoon reading about her childhood and what life was like growing up in the 30's and 40's on a farm and how she and my grandfather came to date and later marry and work the railways as cooks and so forth.
It has to be one of THE most precious gifts I've ever received for my birthday because she is the only grandparent I have left and if I hadn't asked her about her life, there's a LOT of things I might never have known about her on a personal level. Looking at a family tree is such a different thing...it really tells you so little about your family...but now I have stories I can sit and tell my daughter about that later she will be able to tell her children about because she will remember her great grandmother not just from being around her, but because what my grandmother wrote for me will be passed on- generation after generation. My only regret is that I never got a chance to ask my other grandparents do something similar.
My birthday was made even better after that because my daughter- 7 years old- gave me a "present" that included some of her bracelets and a bead necklace, but even better than that was a handmade birthday card she drew. (See Photos below)

My child astounds me with her neverending faith and belief in me, even when I have so little in myself. LOL All in all it was a good birthday. I recieved birthday money from my aunt, my parents and my grandmother and my MIL and her husband. I received two beautiful cracked glass butterfly votive holders and Cafe Au Lait Yankee Candle Company votives to go with them from my FIL and his wife.
I also received a lot of wonderful birthday wishes from friends, old schoolmates, and acquaintances via Facebook and email, so it really improved the day and reminded me that things are never as bad as they might seem! LOL
Another thing I believed that helped was that Mercury has finally gone fully direct- on my birthday and since then it seems that I have been able to see things more clearly and I sense some pretty major life changes headed this way. I'm not sure what they are exactly, but I can feel it deep in the marrow of my bones that changes are in the winds. One big one is that, thanks to our recent tax refund, if all goes well, I might finally be able to get my laptop that I had planned to get a couple of years ago before several homeowner emergencies arose all at the same time (leaky roof, stove overheating and the washer gave out all at once).
Of course, searching for a laptop for myself with the things I need is becoming quite the headache and I've had to take a break. I don't want to make an investment till I know I'm sure of what I want or need on it.
Well, that's it for now I suppose. Tune in next time for more exciting news from the writing cave (aka my living room- though if I get the laptop my writing cave could become more mobile! LOL)

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